Wednesday, January 4, 2012

LOSING FRIENDS

What do you do when a friend suddenly doesn't want to talk to you anymore?

Young people's heart is like sensitive thermometers. One minute you feel everything is great, and the next suddenly feel so down you're convinced you must be the most worthless person in the world. You may also be overwhelmed by great sadness and despair because of problem with friends, heartache over love or the illness of family member.

I assure you it is completely natural to experience such extremes of emotion and self-doubt while young, so you needn't compound your sadness by worrying that you feel that way. Rest assured that whatever your hardships, you will someday look back on them and they will all seem like a dream.

That said, it is important to recognize that as you go through such situations, the same is usually true for your friends. Therefore, the best thing to do is to have the courage to ask the friend who seems to be shunning you what's bothering her (or him). You will very likely find that the last thing she wanted to do was treat you coldly, and that in reality, while you neglected to find out what was wrong with her for fear of being hurt, she, too, was feeling rejected and lonely.

Human relationships are like a mirror. If you're thinking, "If only so-and-so were a little nicer to me, I could talk to him about how I fell," that person is probably thinking the same thing.

While it takes a bit of courage to make the initial attempt, a good plan would be to make the first move to open channels of communication. If, despite these efforts, you are still rebuffed, then the person you should feel sorry for is your friend.

We can not read what's in another's heart; the human heart is much too complex. People change-it's as simple as that. If your friend shares the same feelings about the friendship as you do, then it is likely to last a long time. But if he or she decides to opt out, then it will be short-lived. You yourself may unintentionally let a friend down, causing a rift in your relationship. My advice is that you hold fast to your identity regardless of how other may appear to change. ចូលរក្សាអារម្មណ៍ល្អ ចិត្តគំនិតល្អ ទៅលើអ្នកដ៏ទៃបើទោះជាអ្នកនោះមានការផ្លាស់ប្តូរយ៉ាងណាក៏ដោយ ។

If you are snubbed or let down by others, have the strength of character to vow that you will never do the same to anyone else. Though they usually do not realize it, those who betray other's trust are only hurting themselves. Those who intentionally hurt their friends are truly pathetic; it's as though they are driving a spike through their own heart.
បើសិនជាអ្នកត្រូវបានគេធ្វើរឿងមិនល្អ មិនគ្បីមកលើនោះ ចូលរឹងប៉ឹងឡើយ ហើយសច្ចាថាអ្នកមិនធ្វើរឿងដែលម្មាក់នោះធ្វើមកលើអ្នកទៅលើអ្នកដ៏ទៃឡើយ ។

Character and integrity are very important. Mutual respect and trust are crucial for creating real friendship. Naturally, there will be times when you have arguments and disagreements with your friends. But there should always be an underlying spirit of respect and consideration for each other. In friendship, we mustn't think only of ourselves.
ភាពស្មោះត្រង់និងការគោរពគ្នាទៅវិញទៅមក មានសារៈសំខាន់ណាស់ដើម្បីបង្កើតមិត្តភាពដ៏ល្អមួយ ។ វាជារឿងធម្មតាទេដែលអ្នក និងមិត្តរបស់អ្នកមានការឈ្លោះទាស់ទែងខ្វែងគំនិតគ្មាជាច្រើនលើកច្រើនសារនោះ ប៉ុន្តែទោះជាយ៉ាងនេះក្តីចូលរក្សាការគោរព និងការគិតចំពោះគ្នាទៅវិញទៅមក ។

In any event, should a friendship end, there is no need to grow despondent. You don't have to beat yourself up, thinking every friendship must last forever. The important thing is that you remember that true meaning of friendship and that you make that true meaning the basis for your interactions with others.

If one friend lets you down, don't stop trusting people; go and make a new friend. If you don't trust anyone, you might avoid being hurt or let down, but you'll find yourself leading a lonely existence locked up in your shell. The fact is, only someone who has experience pain and hardship can empathize with others and treat them with kindness. The essential to do, therefore, is to become strong.


Source: The way of youth, by: Diasaku Ikeda

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